Update

Update on what's going on....I came home from the hospital last night around 9 pm. They inserted a PICC line around 7:00, after trying in my left arm unsuccessfully, they finally got it into my right arm. It is in a bad place, right in the crook of my elbow, so it is very painful, but at least it is in. They decided not to do the drain because they said the fluid collection did not fit the criteria for a drain (it didn't have clear boarders, it wasn't big enough, it wasn't in a good place) So....that is both good and bad news to me. Good because I will not have a drain hanging out of me, but bad because we will not get a sample of the bacteria that caused this (if it was even the cause). They have decided to treat me with IV antibiotics at home. I had the visiting nurse come today for the first time and give me my antibiotic. It is a much more involved process at home than in the hospital. But at least I am home! Here are some things you can pray for: PICC lines run the risk of infection and bloodclots. I seem to be prone to complications, so please pray that these don't occur. Also pray that this antibiotic will take care of the problem once and for all and I don't have to run to the hospital once a month for the rest of my life. On a lighter note, here are some observations I have made from my experiences:
Ways to know you have been in the hospital too long:
1) You have a favorite room on a certain floor and know what the bad rooms are just by hearing the room numbers
2) You immediately notice changes to the hospital menu upon first glance
3) Nurses, secretaries and techs say "Oh, you're back" upon seeing you
4) You are on a first name basis with your doctors and consider inviting them to your next birthday party
5) You know which elevators to take and which to avoid because they make scary creaking noises
6) Your friends pencil "visit Erin at Butterworth Hospital" into their weekly plans
7) You change your mailing address to Michigan Ave., Grand Rapids.

Setback

As many of you know Erin had a setback yesterday.  As evidenced by her last post she has been doing great, but then out of the blue she spiked another fever and felt crappy.  We went to the hospital and after all the tests were done she got readmitted...again.  The CT scan shows that she has another abscess in her abdomen which is the most likely cause of the fever.  We've met with the infectious disease specialist (whom I very much respect and trust) and he is recommending another drain as well as at least a two week course of IV antibiotics.  The antibiotics can be done at home, but would be a step in the wrong direction as far as we are concerned.  So, a few procedures need to be done today and the home antibiotics need arranged.  Then...we can go home.  Hopefully tonight, but realistically tomorrow.  The endpoint?  Eradication of the infection...seen on CT scan and on her labs.  Please pray that this healing comes sooner rather than later.  Also, please pray for Erin and her emotional strength.  Frustration is a good word.

While I was on my way home from the hospital last night I was listening to the radio and a song struck a cord in my heart.  It was by Laura Story called "Blessings."  Pay attention to the chorus.  We are praying for God's blessings.

God is good...even when we're frustrated.
Eric

We pray for blessings
We pray for peace
Comfort for family, protection while we sleep
We pray for healing, for prosperity
We pray for Your mighty hand to ease our suffering
All the while, You hear each spoken need
Yet love us way too much to give us lesser things

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

We pray for wisdom
Your voice to hear
And we cry in anger when we cannot feel You near
We doubt Your goodness, we doubt Your love
As if every promise from Your Word is not enough
All the while, You hear each desperate plea
And long that we'd have faith to believe

'Cause what if Your blessings come through raindrops
What if Your healing comes through tears
What if a thousand sleepless nights
Are what it takes to know You’re near
And what if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise

When friends betray us
When darkness seems to win
We know that pain reminds this heart
That this is not, this is not our home
It's not our home

The long road....

So I am learning that recovery is a loooong road. Some days I think I am pretty much back to normal. I get all excited...until I remember that I am still not making dinner, getting up every night with the baby (isn't my mom INCREDIBLE?!), I don't really go anywhere and I still take a nap every afternoon. I wish I could freeze time while I get better. If you know me, you know I never stay home, am always on the go, and hate to miss out on anything. However, I have learned in this recovery process that in order to get better, I have to take it easy, stay home and just focus on getting better. So I miss things. At first I didn't really care, I was so tired, so weak, I just was surviving. But now I am starting to realize how impatient I am to get better so life can get back to normal! I feel like time is passing me by and I can't do the things I want to do. (Like hang out with my good friend who is moving across the ocean in 2 months! Shout out to you, R.B.!) However, I am trying to learn the lessons that He has for me during this time of quiet. This is again, from my devotional (Jesus Calling), 

"Listen to me continually, I have much to communicate to you, so many people and situations in need of prayer. I am training you to set your mind on Me more and more, tuning out distractions through the help of My Spirit. Walk with Me in holy trust, responding to my initiatives rather than trying to make things fit your plans. I died to set you free, and that includes freedom from compulsive planning. (did she write this book for me?!) When your mind spins with a multitude of thoughts, you cannot hear My voice. A mind preoccupied with planning plays homage to the idol of control. Turn from this idolatry back to Me. Listen to Me and live abundantly!"

I have learned over the last year or so what a control freak I am. I plan and plan and want things to go just as I plan them. This reminds me that that is a form of idolatry and I am being given a gift during this time, to relax and wait patiently and listen for His voice. I don't always like it, but growth and maturity is often a hard process. 

On a lighter note: the kids! 

Cole is doing well, continuing to read like crazy and love school. We have seen him act differently lately, in what we think is a response to the craziness in our lives. But we are working through it, and he will be fine in time. 

Cooper just learned to ride his bike without training wheels this weekend! My precious Cooper....how do I say this nicely....he is highly unmotivated to do most things (get dressed himself, put on his own socks/shoes, learn his letters) But when he wants to do something, by golly there's no stopping him! So he is now jetting up and down the sidewalks like a pro.

Alex is talking up a storm and loving life. He has so much joy and is such a friendly little guy, loving everyone and making us laugh all the time. We solved our crib dilemma (I am not allowed to lift him) by putting a storage bin and a step stool outside his crib and teaching him to climb over the rail. Crazy, I know, but it works. 

Tucker is doing well too. He has fussy days, and good days. He is sleeping well at night (getting up 2 times to eat) and getting big (almost 10 lbs!). Everyone thinks he looks like my dad (we agree) and he reminds us a lot of Cole as a baby. All of our other kids have fit the birth order stereotypes to a T, so we are wondering what little Tucker will be like as he gets older! 

Eric is back to work full time and sleep deprived as usual. My mom is still here, bless her heart, and will be for at least a week and up to 3 weeks, depending on how things go.
That's it for now! Thanks soooo much for your continued prayers! 

Things I (Erin) never thought I would have to do.

Things I never thought I would have/do:

*Have an open wound in my stomach…or two.

*Have my clothes stick to my skin because there is so much old sticky tape stuck to me from covering said wound.

*Send an old box of store bought cookies I found in my cupboard with my child as his birthday treat (if you know my love of birthdays you would understand this pain.

*Let my kids go out in public in unmatching clothes.

*Let my kids wear sweats in 80 degree weather because no one knows where the other seasons’ clothes are.

*Lay in my bed every morning for twenty minutes trying to get up but can’t because of back pain

*Know all the nurses on 5 West on a first name basis.

*Owe half a million dollars to Butterworth Hospital. (Don’t worry, we have good insurance.)

*Know how to tell the nurses where to start an IV on me, and tell them which places to avoid.

*Ask my six year old to pull my one and a half year old out of his crib.  Amazingly it is working great.

*Have my own pillbox and pill splitter…you know, like your grandma does.

*Consider walking to the mailbox my daily exercise.

*Actually like back massages.

*Been sooo thankful that my husband is a surgeon.  Usually I wish he worked at Subway so he could be home by 5.

*Lose nineteen pounds in one day (water weight from all the fluids they pumped into me.)

*Ride in a motorized cart at Meijer to get my groceries.  Oh yes I did!!

Overall update: I am definitely feeling better these days!  My main problem now is that I simply lack stamina and energy.  I wear out quickly and have to sit down, which is hard with four little ones and a house to run.  Thankfully my mom is  still here and doing a lot of the work.  I am trying to transition back to life without her by taking over a new job each day.  I will slowly add dishes, diapers, getting breakfast for everyone etc. until I am able to do everything on my own.  The other complicating factor is that Tucker has started being really fussy anytime he’s not sleeping.  So, we are trying to figure out what’s causing this…and make it stop!!  We still covet your prayers as we continue down the road to complete healing.  Thanks for your support!

Progress

Things are getting back on a routine here at the Mitchell house.  It is a different routine than before Tucker was born, but it is routine none the less.  I have gone back to the hospital full time...as a doctor, and it was a blessing to find that I still remember how to operate.  One of the junior residents that is on my service was there the night of Erin's surgery and helped with the operation.  I joked with him that because he has seen her insides, he has seen more of my wife than I have.  Erin is gaining strength each day and she is slowly resuming the daily activities of the house.  Her mom is still here with us and we anticipate that she'll be here until the end of the month.  If anyone knows of a "mother-in-law" award I can nominate her for, let me know.  Erin's dad has also been a trooper since he has to be a bachelor during the week, then drive 5 hours from Ohio on the weekends to see his wife and family.  Thanks Wayne!!
Today was Erin's last day of oral antibiotics so we are on red alert for a relapse of infection.  I don't have any reason to believe that she will start having fevers again, but we have been conditioned to have anxiety.  Pray that we continue on the upward swing.
Tucker is doing great.  He is sleeping well and usually wakes up twice in the night to eat.  If we could get Alex to stop waking up at night we'd get some good quality sleep.
Thanks to all for praying, for caring, and for learning along with us.  

Proverbs 31

One Sunday morning during Erin’s hospitalization I had the chance to get away and attend our adult Bible fellowship (Sunday school class).  Our class had been working our way through Proverbs and interestingly that Sunday we talked about Proverbs 31.  That lesson ended up being the capstone course in my week long lesson in how great Erin is.  You see, I thought I knew all that Erin did on a day to day basis, but throughout that week I had one lesson after another about how much she did to keep our life in order and running smoothly.  The old saying, “You don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone” rang true.  It took Chris (Erin’s mom), my mom, various helpers from church, and me working together to do what she normally did around the house.  Lucky for us Tucker was the perfect baby; and I said on more than one occasion, “If Erin were home right now, she’d make taking care of four kids look like a piece of cake.”  For us, we held down the fort, but it rarely went smooth.  My favorite memory is of my sleep deprived mom trying to fill a baby bottle with coffee creamer instead of formula.  Another example is when I took Tucker to his first well baby visit with the pediatrician.  We have been taking our kids there for four years, and I had no idea where the office even was.  I had to call Erin in the ICU to get directions. I was proud of myself that I remembered to take the diaper bag, but I didn’t realize until I had arrived that key ingredients were missing.  I had no burp cloth, so when Tucker spit up all over I had to clean him up with a piece of rough paper towel.  I had no backup clothes so he continued to wear his puke stained outfit and I was praying that he wouldn’t explode out the other end.  The pediatrician asked me how many wet diapers he had been having and I confessed I had no idea.  I was glad Dr. Mantia knew the circumstances surrounding our visit or he would have thought I was a deadbeat dad.  Erin would have aced the visit and kept the other three boys in line at the same time.

By the second week of Erin’s hospitalization the boys were so out of routine that they were exhausted.  Erin always had them on a schedule and they functioned so well within their standard activities.  Chris was doing a phenomenal job mothering them, but every day was a new day with new people coming in and out to help.  One evening Chris and I were trying to plan out our evening and we wanted them in bed at a decent hour.  We thought we had a good plan…dinner would be delivered by a caring friend at 5 pm, we would eat quickly, then take the boys up to visit Erin at the hospital.  If we could leave by 5:30 we could have a good visit and be back in time to get the boys in bed.  However, when the meal was delivered at 5:00 it needed to bake for an hour.  Grrr.  By the time we would finish eating, there would be no time to drive up to visit Erin.  Plans foiled.  Frustrated I thought to myself, “If Erin had been here, she would have planned ahead and known whether the meal had to be cooked or not.”  She always thinks of stuff like that.  She’s always on time.  Snacks and water are always packed.  The cupboards are always stocked…and she always getting stuff on sale.  She’s always one step ahead of me, organized and planning what we’re going to do five weeks from now.  By the time that lesson in Proverbs rolled around I was pretty sure that God was trying to cement in my brain how great of a wife I had in Erin. 

Proverbs 31:10-31

A wife of noble character, who can find?

Her worth is far beyond rubies.

Her husband has full confidence in her

And lacks no good thing.

She has done him good not evil

All the days of her life.

She looked for wool and flax;

She was pleased to work with her hands.

She was like the merchant ships:

She would bring her food from afar.

She got up while it was still night

And provided food for her household

And a portion for her maids.

She considered a field and bought it;

From her own income she planted a vineyard.

She girded herself with strength

And strengthened her arms.

She saw that her business was thriving;

Her lamp would not go out at night.

She set her hand to the distaff;

Her fingers worked the spindle.

She spread her arms to the poor;

She reached out her hand to the needy.

She would not worry about the snow for her household

Because all her household was clothed in scarlet.

She made covers for herself.

Her clothing was fine linen and purple.

Her husband is prominent in the city gates

When he sits with the elders of the people.

She made linen garments and sold them.

She sold belts to the merchants.

Strength and honor were her clothing:

She laughed at the days to come.

She opened her mouth with wisdom,

Loving instruction was on her tongue.

She is the one who oversaw all the activities of her household;

She would not eat the bread of idleness.

Her children rose up and called her blessed.

As for her husband, he praised her:

"Many women have done well,

But you surpassed them all!"

Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting,

But a woman who fears the LORD, she ought to be praised.

Give her credit for what she has done;

Let her works praise her in the city gates.

This particular translation was done by a girl in our ABF named Jill Zwyghuizen who just finished her PhD in Old Testament studies.  A portion of her dissertation was on verb tenses in Hebrew poetry.  She provided amazing insight into Proverbs 31 and argues that when it is translated into English that it should be past tense instead of present tense.  (I can’t remember all the details as to why.  If you want to know I can hook you up with her email address.)  When written in present tense the reader can be overwhelmed by the amount of tasks and expectations a Godly woman is supposed to do every day.  However, when read in past tense it sounds like an older man is reflecting back on the life of his wife and recalling all the things she did that made her so phenomenal.  It could have been written as a eulogy or as an example to his sons on what to look for in a wife.

Thankfully I am not writing a eulogy.  Instead I am brought to my knees before the LORD saying, “Thank you God for giving me such a great wife and for allowing me to keep her by my side.  I wouldn’t be the man I am today without her and my boys wouldn’t be who they are either.”  

I'm glad that I was forced to oversee the day to day workings of the house for three weeks.  Now I can add to my list many more things that make Erin a Proverbs 31 woman.  By the time we are old and grey I will look back and echo the writer of Proverbs 31.  And, as I'm reading this passage to my boys I will encourage them to find a wife who is exactly like their mother.   

Pictures

We thought everyone would enjoy a few pictures of little Tucker.  He's getting big already.  Good thing if he wants to keep up with his older brothers.
Please pray for Erin as she had a rough day today.  She was very busy and her body is feeling the effects of being too active too soon.
Cooper and Tucker

 All the boys on Easter, the first day we were all together since Tucker was born.

 Erin's parents Wayne and Chris.  I don't know where we'd be without them.  The best in-laws ever!!

Some thoughts from Erin

This is Erin speaking. I just wanted to share a little bit of how I am feeling these days. Eric has been writing most of this blog (who knew he was such a great writer?!) but I wanted to add something today. These days I vacillate between feeling good and encouraged for my recovery, and feeling completely overwhelmed and like I will NEVER return to feeling normal and have the energy I used to have. How did I get so many kids?!?! J And they are needy and energetic and it sometimes seems too much for me. I love them so much and am so thankful for them, but wow. Some “normal” things now terrify me: 1) Getting up in the morning (not my best time) and getting breakfast for everyone and everyone dressed 2) Getting 4 kids into my van and somewhere anytime before noon  3)Cleaning my own house  4)Being home alone with the kids when Eric is on an on-call weekend 5) Going to the grocery store with or without the kids (Let’s be honest, taking them all to the grocery store terrified me on my best day J) I know what you are thinking, no one is expecting me to do these things right now. And you are right. But it is hard to believe I will ever be able to do them. I know God has brought me so far in just a few weeks and will continue to strengthen me day by day. 

One thing I have learned through this whole ordeal is a burden to pray for the chronically ill. I have the hope (Eric promises me!) of a full recovery, but many live with pain every day. This experience has taught me a lot about people with chronic pain. I have such empathy for them and my heart breaks that they have to spend their lives feeling this way. Lord, give me compassion for these people, bring them to mind, and help me to pray for them faithfully. Most of them you would never know b/c they are quiet about their pain. God, take away their pain. I can’t wait for Heaven (or as Cole would say, the New Earth) where there will be no more night, no more pain, no more tears, never crying again. Jesus, come soon and deliver us!

Lastly, I wanted to share a thought from a devotional my sweet friend Heather K. sent to me. It was the first one I read in the book (Jesus Calling by Sarah Young) and I couldn’t believe how perfect it was and how it spoke to our situation so well.

“Trust me in every detail of your life. Nothing is random in my kingdom. Everything that happens fits into a pattern for good, for those who love Me. Instead of trying to analyze the intricacies of the pattern, focus your energy on trusting Me and thanking Me at all times. Nothing is wasted when you walk close to Me.”

 I love the part that nothing is wasted. My time in the hospital, all the pain, the struggle, none of that is wasted. God will somehow choose to use this in our lives. “Not to us O Lord, not to us, but to your Name be the Glory forever”. 

Eggs with a side of manna

After a few days in the ICU we began seeing God answer prayers just as fast as I could send out the requests.  Erin kept spiking temps as high as 103, and she would feel like trash during those periods of the day.  We prayed that they would just go away since there was no obvious source.  Well, the next day her fevers started going down.  Erin's white blood cells at one time were 28 (pretty high) and we prayed that they would go back down to normal.  It did.  She had an ultrasound of her heart that showed it was pumping only half as strong as it should.  We prayed.  Five days later they repeated the ultrasound and her heart function had returned to normal.  At one time the doctors were worried that her hormones and pituitary gland would be permanently effected from her episodes of extremely low blood pressure.  After some prayer and testing everything checked out ok.  There were many more ups and downs during our hospital stay, but with each of these answers to prayer we began erecting piles of stones...Ebenezers that reminded us of God's faithfulness.  Then, during the dark times of feeling depressed and like Erin would never get better we would just remind ourselves of how God had been faithful thus far.  

Through all this, I began to understand how the Isrealites doubted God so much while they were traveling to the promised land.  The book of Exodus details all the miraculous ways God revealed himself to the Isrealies and how He provided for them during there journey from Egypt to the promised land.  I'm sure this was a pretty stressful time and the entire Jewish nation's faith was stretched to the max.  I mean, at some points they didn't even know where their next meal was going to come from.  Death loomed close, they were extremely vulnerable, and the end of the journey was far in the distance.  God did provide for the Isrealites needs (manna and quail from heaven) and answer their cries for help, but soon after they would lose faith and begin to worry about the next hurdle ahead of them (.  It was the exact same for us.  Our faith was stretched to the max, death loomed close, we were vulnerable, and the end of the journey remains far in the distance.  God did provide for us, yet we were so forgetful that we let worry creep in and we would forget to trust in God.  My medical brain made this worse.  I could always think of some catastrophic complication to worry about.  We continue to struggle with this, but remembering what He has brought us through keeps things in perspective.  God is good.  His ways are good.  His plans are greater than our plans.  Don't lose faith. Don't lose sight of the promised land. 

After the first week in the ICU Erin began to do the everyday things that you and I take for granted.  She ate eggs and toast for breakfast, and we would take walks together in the hallway.  The walks were very slow walks, trying to keep her butt from showing out of the back of the gown.  I wrote an email encouraging everyone to go for a walk with his/her spouse that day.  I still encourage you to cherish each other and the health that you both have.  At one point that week Erin told me that she was bored.  That was a huge milestone.  No grass grows under Erin's feet, and this was a sign that she was still the same Erin I married seven years ago.  

Erin officially "got out of the woods” that week.  Unlike the last 3 patients with this problem at our hospital, she lived.  This is only a testimony to God’s grace, mercy and divine plans.  However, in order to get back to our house from the woods we had to continue on that long road to recovery.  My biggest prayer request had been (and still is) that there will be NO LASTING EFFECTS of this whole ordeal, only memories and a scar.  I pray that one year from now Erin will be back to her pre-pregnancy weight running in the Riverbank run, and celebrating her health. 

Psalm 40

 ¹ I waited patiently for the LORD; 
   he turned to me and heard my cry. 
² He lifted me out of the slimy pit, 
   out of the mud and mire; 
he set my feet on a rock 
   and gave me a firm place to stand. 
³ He put a new song in my mouth, 
   a hymn of praise to our God. 
Many will see and fear the LORD 
   and put their trust in him.

 ⁴ Blessed is the one 
   who trusts in the LORD, 
who does not look to the proud, 
   to those who turn aside to false gods.^[b] 
5 Many, LORD my God, 
   are the wonders you have done, 
   the things you planned for us. 
None can compare with you; 
   were I to speak and tell of your deeds, 
   they would be too many to declare.

Every cloud has a silver lining.

For some reason, God chose to provide Erin and I with life lessons through the context of a post partum catastrophe.  People often wonder why bad things happen to good people, or why we have to deal with crappy situations.  We all hope that one day we can look back after time has passed and realize the good that came out of the bad.  The day after surgery I was in the ICU in Erin’s room when I thought to myself, “I bet that in a few years I will look back at this event and see that a lot of good came out of this situation.  Somehow God will be glorified through all of this.”  Little did I know that I wouldn’t have to wait a year…that I’d already be seeing God’s hand in it within the next three days.  Erin has been keeping a list of all the "God sightings," or times that God works in ways that are obviously of Him.  I'm amazed at the length of this list in such a short time.  Because of this ordeal, relationships have been strengthened, lives have been touched, and conversations were had that would have never taken place.  All this glory because of an unfortunate situation.  

  

Tragedy stinks.  Pain hurts.  Inconvenience is annoying and difficult.  Anxiety causes you to have a knot in your stomach that inhibits you from eating and a wound up brain that keeps you awake at night.  We try our hardest to avoid these emotions with the thought that life will be better without them.  I think you have to define “better.”  I’m pretty sure Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian have had very few trials in life as they were given everything they needed and kept out of harm’s way.  Are they “better?” On the other hand, some of the wisest and most respected people I know are the ones who have gone through the darkest valleys and had their faith refined by the fire of affliction.  These people can come alongside someone who is hurting and provide council, empathy, and a caring shoulder to cry on.  As much as I hate what we have been through, I am sure it will make Erin and I better people.  

Worst night of my life.

Erin's surgery took about 2 hours.  She got to the recovery room after midnight and when I went in to see her I was surprised to see Amy Bergwerf’s mom (a friend of ours from church) there taking care of her.  What a small world.  The anesthesiologist was able to extubate her and miraculously she continued to oxygenate well on her own through the night.  Erin remembers Dr. Kemmeter mentioning that she was one of the sickest patients he had taken care of who did not require intubation (a breathing tube).  I guess Erin is a pretty strong woman.  Now that I think about it, before surgery she tolerated peritonitis (severe infection of the abdomen) for two days with only the occasional Motrin. (Most people get strong IV medications to stay comfortable.)  What a woman!!

For this next part, I'm going to use a lot of medical terms and will try to explain them the best I can.  If something needs clarification, please just ask in a comment and I'll do my best to describe it in digestible lingo. Once Erin was moved to the surgical ICU she required a lot of support that night to keep her alive.  Her body reacted so strongly to the infection that she required powerful medications to keep her blood pressure up (norepinephrine and vasopressin) along with 10 liters of IV fluid (about 20 lbs of water weight).  To understand the body's reaction to infection, think of it like this...if you scratch your arm with a stick in the woods you will notice that the area gets red and swollen.  This is your body's normal response to trauma, infection etc.  Blood vessels dilate to bring more blood to the site of intrusion so that you can fight infection and begin the healing process.  Your blood vessels also get leaky and plasma infiltrates into the fat, muscle, skin etc.  This fluid is what causes the swelling.  Well, Erin didn't just sustain a small cut, she had bacteria in all her body.  All her blood vessels dilated and became leaky.  A lot of her plasma leaked out of her blood vessels.  Thus, the medication and fluids counteracted the pathophysiology of the infection.  

I remember seeing her first set of post op labs and feeling a little relieved.  Before surgery her creatinine had doubled from 0.6 to 1.2 (her kidneys were beginning to shut down), she was acidotic, and had a WBC of 1.8 (bad).  Two hours postop her labs were improved and she began to make urine again (if you are peeing then you have enough plasma in the blood vessels).  Even though her heart rate was 150, I felt that we were making some progress in getting her better.  That night I slept in a chair next to her bed holding her hand.  It wasn't very comfortable and I swear I woke up every fifteen minutes.  I remember saying over and over “Please God, don’t take her away from me now.”  I don’t know if I was saying this when I was awake or asleep, or both. 

Over the next two weeks Erin and I found out how much prayer support was summoned that night on Erin’s behalf.  Our church body, friends, family members and even the nurses began prayer chains that reached around the US and as far as Kenya, Togo, Chile, and Italy.  I don’t know exactly how many people prayed, but it seemed to be enough to fend off the DIC (disseminated intravascular coagulation) that is so prevalent with severe post partum infections.  Erin’s midwife later told us that she returned to the OB floor after Erin was in the OR and the nurses who had taken care of her asked “How is she going to do?  Is she going to make it?”  The midwife responded with “I’m not sure.”  Several nurses then said to the midwife, “Watch this,” and they started making phone calls to start prayer chains.  How amazing.  People who had never met Erin were praying for her.  Those nurses who believed in the power of modern medicine also believed in the power of the Great Physician and the power of prayer.  

That night was the beginning of the road to recovery.  The next three weeks were filled with highs and lows, worry and rejoicing, progress and frustrating setbacks.  However, it didn't matter because Erin was alive and feisty enough to fight through the recovery.  

Daily Update

Taking a break from the detailed history of the past month, we wanted to give an update on how I (Erin) am feeling.  Eric went back to work full time today. I had a really good night’s sleep without any back spasms or neck cramps.  I've never appreciated a good nights sleep more than I do now.  I was able to get out of bed without help (Yeah!!) and come down and have breakfast with the boys. I am amazed at how needy they are. Were they always like this? I think they were, at least at meal times. My mom never sat down for a minute, and I was even making Cole get some of the stuff himself. It was overwhelming for me to think about getting me and them ready and fed in time to go anywhere. How will I ever do that?? I had an Interventional Radiology appointment in the afternoon and just leaving the house exhausted and overwhelmed me.  However, the good news was that I got my drain removed! They said the abscess is gone, which, while I am super happy to have the drain gone, does nothing to explain my random fevers. But I will choose to be glad that the drain is gone and continue to pray for healing from the fevers. 
Laughing is bitter sweet.  My mom is making me laugh tonight, and it hurts my incision.  She was telling a story about a "shim" (she/him) at her work and I was cracking up...and cracking my incision.  

Events leading up to surgery II

It was going to take about an hour to get the OR ready so they decided to transfer her to the surgical ICU.  At this point I knew Erin was sick and I was scared, but I felt a weird mixture of nervousness and relief.  For the past 48 hours I had felt like I was in the middle of the familiar nightmare where I was running full speed but not getting anywhere.  Now that we were finally getting somewhere I was able to let go a little.  Plus, she was going into my part of the hospital now, the SICU, where I knew all the nurses and residents.  Erin was in the ICU for about a half hour and I have two vivid memories of that time.  One memory was of Dr. K. pulling me aside and telling me that I needed to shut off the doctor part of my brain and concentrate on being a husband and father.  He also said that I will need to pace myself because this is going to be a long night and a long road.  He said he knew this personally because sixteen years ago he went through a similar situation when his wife almost died after the birth of their baby girl.  She had an undiagnosed bleeding disorder (vWF deficiency) and required an emergent hysterectomy due to uncontrollable hemorrhage.  It meant a lot to me that he could empathize with my situation, and it only made me trust him more with Erin’s life.  I knew that he would work his hardest to keep her alive because he knew that the stakes were high.  

When the ICU staff was preparing Erin for surgery I was in at her bedside trying to comfort her and be with her before they took her away.  For some reason I walked out of the room into the hallway and out of no where stood my very good friend Jeremy Bergwerf.  It was impeccable timing.  At that very moment the gravity of the situation and the emotion I had built up hit me all at once and I fell apart.  We embraced and I lost it.  I began sobbing uncontrollably into his chest (he’s 6’7) right in front of everyone.  Not only was I a grown man crying, but also a chief resident that had broken down in front of the residents I led, the nurses who had followed my orders, and the surgeons who were my bosses.  I didn’t really care, and perhaps it made them work all the more to keep Erin alive.  Jeremy being there was definitely a God thing, and was actually a little eerie.  I don’t know why, but about a year ago I had daydreamed about what would happen if Erin and I had a major tragedy. At that time I thought, “Who would be my support system in a time of dire need?  Who would comfort me if something ever happened to Erin?”  I envisioned a scenario similar to what took place that Sunday in the surgical ICU, with me bawling while hugging Jeremy.  How strange that God would foreshadow to me something like this.  I get chills thinking about it again.  Other friends from church also came to the ICU and their support was invaluable. 

As I was signing the consent for surgery at the desk (the same forms that I had gone over with countless patients) the OR team came and whisked Erin away to surgery.  Just two minutes earlier I had been at her bedside and told her I loved her and that everything was going to be OK, but as she was leaving I didn't take the chance to say “goodbye” one last time.  I could hear her parents talking to her and at that moment I should have chased her down the hallway to kiss her again and hold her hand as she rode the elevator down to the OR area.  I knew that she was being wheeled away from me, but I just sat there signing.  If she would have died on the table I would have regretted that decision the rest of my life.  I guess God knew that this wasn’t the end and that Erin and I would get plenty more chances to be together. 

As Erin tells her side of the story, her memories of going to the OR are funny to me.  It is a place so familiar to me yet so foreign to my closest companion.  I had spent countless hours there, yet she had only heard stories.  Now she was going to the OR and I was forced to wait for the story. 
“I then remember being in the operating room and looking around thinking ‘this is where Eric works everyday’. I tried to take it all in. There were a ton of people in the OR, probably 12. I knew a lot of them and they talked to me and tried to distract me from the arterial line they were having trouble getting in. My mouth was so dry, and I wanted an ice chip so bad, but they put a mask over my mouth and told me to relax. The next thing I remember I was waking up in the recovery area.”

Erin underwent an emergent hysterectomy that night by the OB/GYN friend of mine I called to get a second  opinion.  Dr. K was there to help and they both said her uterus was severely infected and she had pus all throughout her abdomen.  She definitely needed surgery that night and would have died without it.  In fact, there was a strong chance she would die even with surgery.  Erin had a Group A Strep infection of her endometrium (lining of the uterus) that had spread all throughout her body.  Group A Strep is notorious for spreading quickly and being lethal.  By the time she went to surgery she had bacteria growing in her urine, blood, abdomen and uterus.  The toxins from this bacteria caused her to be septic with a toxic shock syndrome and her body took a major insult.

Many friends and family showed up and stayed with me until Erin was out of the OR.  I really felt the peace of God while in the waiting room.  I knew there was nothing I could do but pray and wait, so it was probably the most relaxed I had been in the past two days.  However, it was in the waiting room that we realized that poor little Tucker, only 3 days old, was still in the newborn nursery set to be evicted that night by 10pm.  I realized that in addition to taking care of Erin, I also had to take care of a newborn and the three older boys.  But, as I looked around the waiting room I realized that I was not alone.  Erin's parents and our church family had already begun organizing the "Mitchell Grand Plan" of how we were going to manage all the things that Erin usually takes care of on a day to day basis.  More on that later.

Often I ask my patients and their families what they have learned by going through a major illness and a hospitalization.  I get various answers, some profound, others not.  Because of Erin’s infection I had the opportunity to be the husband instead of the doctor.  I was the one on the other side of the bed who had to be stressed, tired, and anxious while trying to be calm, patient, trusting, and faithful.  As I ask myself “What have you learned from this experience”, several things come to mind. 

T    The human body is strong and miraculous but is also susceptible.  The human spirit is the same.  Erin’s body took a major hit with the sepsis and need for surgery.  She was doing so well after the delivery until the bacteria rapidly infected her uterus.  Her body was strong enough to begin to fight the sepsis and hold on for 2 days until the doctors could figure out what the cause was.  However, given time the infection would have overcome her body’s ability to fight.  She mounted such an inflammatory response that she required an emergent hysterectomy and a lot of ICU care to stay alive.  Again, her body possessed the reserve to handle such a stress that she is now bouncing back relatively quickly.   Both her spirit and mine have also been tested and stretched.  Through it all she remained optimistic and resolved, but was also susceptible to doubt, fear, and anxiety.  Her attitude was so positive and she pushed herself to get better, doing all the things the nurses asked of her.  However, periods of anxiety did come, and she was forced to deal with the emotions of having a baby at home and not being able to take care of it, as well as three other boys who are out of routine.  My mind went through a similar battle, trying to stay strong and optimistic yet plagued with “what ifs” and fears.  After Erin came out of surgery that Sunday night all I can remember is kneeling at her bedside holding her hand saying “Please God don’t take her away from me.”  That night of the surgery was the most stressful and fear provoking time of my entire life.  That brings me to learning point number two.  Where I am weak, He is strong.  Never before have I been so scared, so nervous, so helpless.  Having the physician mind only made it worse.  However, through this experience I have learned more than ever before that it is during these times of helplessness that we have the opportunity to glorify the Lord the most.  Completely resting in his hands and dwelling in His courts is where God wants us to be.  He wants us to be completely broken and to cry out to him for help.  Unfortunately in our culture of self sufficiency it takes tragedy and affliction to humble us enough to get to this point.

Psalm 27

¹ The LORD is my light and my salvation— whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life— 
   of whom shall I be afraid? ² When the wicked advance against me to devour^[a] me, it is my enemies and my foes who will stumble and fall. ³ Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war break out against me, even then I will be confident.  ⁴ One thing I ask from the LORD, this only do I seek: 
that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze on the beauty of the LORD 
   and to seek him in his temple. ⁵ For in the day of trouble he will keep me safe in his dwelling; he will hide me in the shelter of his sacred tent and set me high upon a rock.

It is such a blessing to be a part of the body of Christ.  I don’t know where we would be if it weren’t for the hundreds of people from around the world who have prayed and are still praying for us.  Plus, the outpouring of love and support from our family, church body, and friends brings me to tears every time I think of it.  I hope that the non Christians who witness this support want desperately to have what we have…the Love of Christ poured out on us first through salvation, and then through a body of people that all work, live and sacrifice out of gratitude for what Christ first did for us.  

Events leading up to surgery

Thursday 3/15/12

Tucker Henry was born at 4pm…uneventful, joyous, routine.  He was healthy, quiet, perfect.  I even made the comment to Erin “I can’t believe we have had 4 healthy boys without any pregnancy or labor problems.”  We felt very fortunate because Tucker's umbilical cord was tied in a complete knot, yet was long enough that it was never pulled tight enough to cut off blood flow.  The midwife said this is extremely rare.  

  

Friday 3/16/12

On Friday Erin looked and felt great.  She entertained guests, bounced around the room and toyed with the thought of going home that day.  However, at 8pm she began having abdominal pain while breast feeding Tucker.  The nurses and midwife attributed it to uterine contractions typical with a multiparous female.  But, the pains never went away…all night long.  She took a Vicodin and tried to stay comfortable.  I had gone home to sleep that night and Erin called me at 6am saying that she had an awful night of “gas pains.” 

Saturday 3/17/12

When I arrived to the hospital that morning I found Erin in bed complaining of abdominal pains, and her abdomen was distended.  She hadn’t had a BM since before the baby was born but wasn’t nauseated or vomiting.  I was concerned about her am labs and vital signs as they were all slightly off.  The midwife, her attending and the OB resident evaluated her and all said the findings were explainable by the typical post partum period.  Her pain was from her bowels trying to move and so the plan was…aggressive bowel regimen.   Later that day she had increased pain and I asked for a CT scan.  Interestingly it didn’t show much, just a colon full of stool and an ileus.  The uterus looked like a normal post partum uterus…difficult to assess on CT scan.  At this point I was spinning my wheels, a general surgery resident being forced to trust an OB resident, a midwife, and her backup OB doctor.  I began reading OB textbooks online and had created my own differential diagnosis with endometritis at the top of the list.  But…she didn’t have a fever, the hallmark of postpartum infection.  Erin did complain of subjective fevers and chills but nothing documented over 37 C (99 F).  I knew something was not right...and the words of one of my surgery mentors kept resounding in my head, "If it ain't right, it's wrong."  Why would a perfectly healthy woman who had a normal vaginal delivery get constipated postpartum?  I didn't know who to call for a second opinion so I decided to call a colleague's wife.  I ran everything by her and fortunately she was on call for her group and said she would see Erin on rounds the next morning.  From what I told her she agreed with the treatment plan since the CT didn’t show much and she didn’t have a fever.  So, Saturday continued with pain, trying to walk, and no luck with the bowel regimen.  That day was a lesson in trust and patience and stress management.  I knew what it felt like to be an airline pilot taking a transatlantic flight riding coach.  

Sunday 3/18/12

I slept in the hospital call room that night because I was nervous about Erin’s abdominal pain.  I went up to her room about 7:30am and the midwife’s OB backup had already rounded on her.  Erin said he pressed on her belly and said “Once you poop, you can go home.”  My colleague's wife came in for rounds and I asked her a bunch of questions about endometritis, ovarian vein thrombosis, ovarian torsion etc.  Erin’s WBC came down from 18 to 11, (normal is 5-10, higher than 10 is bad, less than 4 is worse) and she continued to have the same pains.  The doctor said that since Erin doesn’t have any fevers and her WBC was near normal that it is difficult to make the decision to start antibiotics for endometritis.  The plan was to continue watching her and I asked for a repeat WBC later that day (to make sure her WBC wasn’t going to go down below 4).  Sunday was one of the worse days of my life…if not THE worst.  Erin writhed in pain all day and I was at the mercy of the doctors.  I called the midwife and told her that Erin wasn’t looking all that good and she came in to see her about 3pm.  She also was concerned and made some phone calls trying to mobilize some troops.  She made a mention of wanting a surgery consult so I decided to call one of my favorite mentors Dr. Kemmeter.  Besides being a great surgeon, I knew he wasn't on call but I knew he would care and that he was the type of guy that gets stuff done.  To my amazement he answered the phone with “Hey Eric, how is she doing?”  I was shocked that he already knew the story so I just told him that Erin looked sick and needed evaluated.  He said “What could be going on with a healthy 33 y/o uncomplicated vaginal delivery?  I’ve been working out in the yard so let me wash my hands and I’ll be in as soon as I can.”    

At 5pm all the chips fell into place at once.  Her repeat WBC came back at 1.9 and her heart rate jumped up to 140, evidence that she was not only sick, but septic.  Whatever infection she had was bad news.  Dr. Kemmeter came to evaluate her and the OB doctor was there too.  At that point the decision was easy.  She needed surgery ASAP.  The running diagnosis at this point was a Group A Strep infection and that meant that we were in for a long night.  Before transferring her to the ICU Dr. Kemmeter sat with us and told Erin what he thought was going on.  He also took the time to pray with us, which meant a lot.  Erin asked him if she was going to die, and he said "I've known Eric for a while now and about the faith you both possess.  I also know about your plans to serve the Lord in missions.  God has big plans for you and therefore He will take care of you."  (A few days later Erin recalls this answer and didn't like that he didn't say a firm NO!  The truth was that he couldn't guarantee anything at the time.)

The Past Month

"They" say that times of transition are when life can be the most stressful.  Job changes, moving, having a baby, etc. force you out of your normal routine and get your adrenal glands kicking out adrenaline.  Many people seek as stress free of life as possible.  Others thrive on it and even create it for fun.  As followers of Christ, the Bible says that we should use these times to grow in our faith and to deepen our dependence on God.  Our family is in the middle of some pretty crazy changes right now.  As a chief surgery resident in Grand Rapids, MI I'll be finishing my training in June and starting my career in July.  Our family has made plans to go to Kenya for two years starting in the summer/fall of 2013.  And, we just had our fourth child.  Little Tucker Henry entered the world on March 15th as the fourth Mitchell boy, and the events following his birth shook us to the core.  Erin developed a severe postpartum infection causing septic shock and necessitating an emergent hysterectomy.  She was in the hospital for 23 days and is continuing to recover.  She was on the verge of death, but because of the power of prayer and God's grace and mercy she is still with us today.

Because of all these events we decided to start a blog.  Many people received the email updates and enjoyed reading the lessons we were learning while going through a very tough time.  In the posts to follow we'll try to recap the events, the lessons learned, and keep those interested updated on Erin's progress.  We will also blog about our preparations for Kenya and the surgical ministry we hope to have at Tenwek Hospital.

In I Samuel 7 the prophet Samuel and the Israelites found themselves under attack by the Philistines.  Samuel prayed to the Lord and He protected the Israelites during this trial.  After the Israelite victory, the Bible records: "Then Samuel took a stone and set it up between Mizpah and Shen, and called its name Ebenezer, saying 'Thus far the Lord has helped us'" (1 Samuel 7:12).   The Blog will also serve as a collection of Ebenezers for us, remembering how God has helped us in times of need.  When we look back and see the many Mounds of Stones we will remember that God is good...all the time.